I am a young mom of two beautiful boys & they are my biggest motivation for striving to live healthy in every way - mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, etc.
I began my journey of becoming a healthy version of myself on February 21, 2018.
My first step was going home to family for some help getting therapy.
I had hit my rock bottom, in so many ways. I was living in an insanity cycle, wanting more & wanting better - yet continuously putting myself in the same situations & unhealthy relationships back to back - that only drug me back even further. I started drinking alcohol occasionally at a very young age, as it was a social ‘norm’ in my family & this ended up with me being a full-blown alcoholic by the time I turned 21 years old.
I was battling depression, anxiety, & PTSD for years without really realizing it or getting any professional help. I was feeling so many negative, overwhelming things I could never explain to anyone. I couldn’t hold a job. I was never happy, no matter what was happening in my life or what I had. I was arrested a few times. I had moments where I thought I was going to die. I dropped out of school. I abandoned my kids. I married a man I didn’t really want to spend forever with. I drowned my pain in alcohol, drugs, & sex - whenever & however I possibly could just to feel something for just a moment.
After years of living in a cycle of abusive/toxic relationships with family, friends & lovers, assaults, bad decisions, & down right traumatic experiences - I finally broke, entirely. I was involuntarily placed in psychiatric facilities 3 times, in less than a year because of my untreated/wrongly treated mental health. (I will talk in more detail about this at another time). The third time I was hospitalized (January 30, 2018) was my real wake up call, I knew in that moment that if I didn’t get some actual help that I was going to end up taking my own life - consciously or subconsciously.
So, February 21, 2018 I took my first step on the road to recovery by getting on that plane & going home to family - which brought me lots of love, support, sobriety, & healing.
In the end, I was nowhere near the person I was just hours before when I stepped off the plane back home & I haven’t stopped growing/healing since. It hasn’t been easy, but it’s definitely been worth it.
Recovery is much more than sobriety from substances - there are so many areas of recovery in my life personally, that I can’t wait to share with you through my testimony.
I may have over two years of recovery, at this point, but this is only the beginning. I still face plenty of hard days/times. My life is not perfect now just because I'm choosing happiness over pain.
Please join me on this lifelong journey of being the person God intended for me to be - while hopefully I can help you tap into your God-given purpose & potential as we navigate through life's storms.
Be the light in your own darkness, darling.